Don't tell me what I can't do...

Whatever you are striving for in life, I guarantee that there will be people always waiting (and hoping) for you to fail. They are not only looking for your inevitable stumble, but they actively try and make it happen sooner rather than later. They will utter the phrases ‘you can’t do that’ and ‘why not do x instead y’’. They will laugh at whatever goals you have set yourself while still maintaining that they are 100% behind you, all while waiting for that hurdle to stop you in your tracks and for you to give up.

When you give up, they win.

The people who fall into the above category will come thick and fast. They will be close friends, relatives, randoms on the internet and people you meet in everyday life. It can be extremely disheartening to tell people your dreams only for them to be thrown back in your face in the form of a smirk, a laugh or even just a complete misunderstanding. As a wannabe poker professional I undoubtedly get this reaction a lot more than your ‘average’ everyday career choice. I can’t tell you the amount of times that I’ve heard the following:

'But poker is all about luck'

‘So you’re a gambling addict’

‘At least you’re not dealing drugs’

‘There’s no money in poker’

‘Do you have a good poker face?'

‘I’m pretty good at poker myself’

These responses are nearly always standard when dealing with people who, quite simply, have literally no idea about the game of poker apart from, maybe, knowing the basic rules. These uninformed responses can sometimes come from a place of genuine intrigue and I am more than happy to delve deeper into my profession with someone who is willing to open their minds and are keen to learn something new. I would also like to point out that a few come from a genuine place of simple concern, no viciousness or malice intent was meant but that doesn’t always help when you’re in need of support and trust from the people around you.   

But more often than not they are simple put downs from people who are just plain ignorant and have no desire to learn. Or they are put downs from people that lack the drive, focus and ambition to chase their own dreams for fear of failure. Sometimes both, rarely neither. That’s not to say that the people I’ve come across on my journey were not open to changing their views on my career of choice, and it is my responsibility to help them come to a more objective conclusion. But this post isn’t about them, it’s about you.

The way you deal with the guaranteed ‘shit-on-your-parade’ type of personalities that will creep in from all around you is just another barrier that you will have to learn how to cope with. You need to take pride in the choices you have decided to make, regardless of the backlash that may follow. So whether you’re out to lose weight, starting a new hobby, or really focusing on the career you’ve always wanted, just remember to listen to yourself. In the wise words of Dr Seuss;

‘You’re on your own and you know what you know. And you are the one who will decide where to go’

I could not have put it any clearer...

Did I just make a mistake?

Anyone who follows poker religiously will know exactly what I mean when I say that poker and life just aren't that different. This may say like some hokey pokey bullshit but when you really start to boil it down it makes perfect sense. In poker you have to try and remain disciplined and patient. You need to learn how to cope with your emotions while making a series of decisions, big or small. You will ride waves of highs where you feel totally untouchable. And the lows where you feel helpless, desperate and alone. Ultimately, you will make a whole bunch of mistakes...whether you know it or not is a whole different aspect. To quote S.J Watson (I have no idea who this but googling 'hindsight quotes' is a lovely little read.

"“It's so difficult, isn't it? To see what's going on when you're in the absolute middle of something? It's only with hindsight we can see things for what they are.”

We have all been there. From relationships, friends and family. To work, sport and everyday hobbies. We can all finish the sentence "I can't believe I..."

Poker, obviously, is no different.

I can't believe I called his 3bet out of position with AJo, I can't believe I called his all in with only pocket jacks, I can't believe I didn't bet the turn and now he's probably hit his flush on the river.

Mistakes are a fundamental part of the game. But it's how you react to those mistakes that, I believe, really separates the men from the boys (Or should I say 'girls from the women' because no doubt I'll get called sexist for some unknown reason).

So while I seem to make mistake after mistake after mistake, that in itself is not the problem. The problem would be if I didn't try and learn from them. To take a step back and understand that in both poker and life, mistakes are just as important as the successes.

"Success is not final, failure is not fatal: it is the courage to continue that counts."
                                                                                                         - Winston Churchill

My New Year Lifestyle

The post Christmas blues are upon us and it's a time for bettering ourselves and to fail miserably at our New Years resolutions. Across the globe people are signing up to gyms and trading in that refreshing beer for some horrible looking green glass of shit.

Not me.

I had an interesting conversation with a friend on the way back from partying ridiculously hard on NYE. She asked me what my New Years resolutions were and I more than obliged to tell her of my plans. I wanted to start yoga, meditation, read up on stocks, shares and business as well as focus intensely on my poker both on and off the virtual table. Not to mention my new love affair with eating healthy and avoiding all the sugary goodness life has to offer. After discussing my plans for a short while I turned to her and stated "But these aren't New Years resolutions, this is a brand new lifestyle"

Resolutions are made to be broken. Lifestyles are made for exactly that, life.

My changes were not made on a whim either. They had been thoroughly thought through in the months prior to January. It just so happens that January 3rd (I needed at least 2 days to properly recover) was a perfect time to start. After coming home from travelling it took me a good 2 months to even begin to start thinking of my future and even after that it was only 2 months until Christmas. All in all it was a recipe for slowing figuring out my plan, enjoying Christmas off (at home for the first time in years) and then settling down and really, truly working on the goals I have set myself for the coming year.

New Years Day. On my hour walk home from the city to my home, listening to my of my favourite albums of all time, The Smith Street Band - Throw me in the River, I got to reflect on everything that has happened prior. I reflected on friends, family, relationships, goals, dreams and, of course, the future. For the first time in my life I have a plan for what exactly I want to achieve. All I needed to do was set out a rough structure to how that would happen. So for the first time ever I have set goals, whether that be for the week, month or year. It could include playing poker, reading a book on business or something as simple as starting my day off with a 10 minute guided mediation. What the goals are is not overly important. What's more important is that I have a plan for how I want to spend my time and not be sat procrastinating. We are all guilty of sieving through facebook and endless pages of Reddit. That is not to say that there is no time for that in my new lifestyle, there certainly is. The only difference is that I make sure I have completed other daily tasks before aimlessly thinking  of what the hell there is to do

So if there is one thing I would like you to take from this post is this. Whatever it is you would like to achieve in life, start making a plan for it. Right now. It may not happen, that's fine. But you might as well try and plan for the best.